I’m looking for the pony, if you know what I mean.
Mom was a philosopher – I take after her. Dad was a critic – I take after him, too.
My purpose at work is to help people negotiate the strange world of insurance, and to see that there is money available to them when disasters happen. The purpose of this blog is to learn how I can best help people in other aspects of life.
A short, but important, observation. Remember this, if nothing else:
“Opinions are like (you know whats). Everybody has one.”
Consider: If you are like most people, you go around with an opinion about everything, including yourself. You judge your past, your situation, your habits, the people around you, the weather, the government, everything. It’s automatic. You are built that way. If not examined or challenged, those opinions tend to be at best limiting, at worst damning, and very probably very exaggerated.
If you listen only to your self-talk, you’re likely to hear it as if it’s true. Be careful. When you actually listen to things you say, you’re likely to be embarrassed. You will have learned something.
To change that, think about your strengths. Remember things you’ve done well. Treasure compliments you’ve received and honor the informed observations of others who notice your strengths. Write them down if you need to, but do cement those notions into your noggin. Your thoughts will serve you or betray you.
People read your mind. They observe your body language, tone of voice, and a lot of factors at an instinctive level. That is where they’ll make up their stories about you.
A story: a long time ago I was passed over for a minimum wage job in a shoe store. ‘m a college grad, was salutatorian of my senior class in high school, not a stupid person. But I couldn’t get a minimum wage job in a shoe store, so I went back to the interviewer and asked him why he passed me over for the job. His response was telling:
“You didn’t sound very confident about being able to operate the point of sale system.” I was astounded.
Not confident! Point of Sale! Shoe Store! It made no difference that I had a college degree, or had worked successfully in a much more complex sales field than shoe retail; I’d been scuttled by an impression in an interview.
I am grateful to that Al Bundy wannabe. Because of him, I changed my thinking, aced my next interview and got the job I wanted.
It boils down to this: When you make up a story about yourself, make it a good one.